


Realizations

by ALargeBear



Category: Love Live! School Idol Project
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-06
Updated: 2016-06-06
Packaged: 2018-07-12 17:46:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7116034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ALargeBear/pseuds/ALargeBear
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes it takes a while to find the person who can truly make you happy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Realizations

**Author's Note:**

> Fair warning, part of this is me just rambling about the futures of each of the girls.

Honoka let out a bored sigh as she leaned against the front counter of her families sweet shop. It was a typical weekday afternoon which meant the shop was empty. After all, nobody bought sweets at one o'clock in the afternoon on a Wednesday. Ever since she had taken over the shop from her parents this boredom was one that she had gotten used to. As usual on days like these, she let her thoughts wander to where they usually did anytime she would get bored, back to those eight girls who had made such a drastic impact on each others lives.

No matter how many times she thought about it, Honoka still couldn't believe that it had been seven years since Muse had officially ended. seven whole years since that one fateful school year that brought nine completely different girls together and connected them for a lifetime.

When Honoka really thought back to those times, it felt so short, maybe because it really was. It was only one whole school year that those nine girls shared together, and yet it felt like so much more. They had all formed a bond with each other that had lasted all this time . They all continued to keep in touch and stay friends even to this day so many years later, no matter where each of their individual lives took them.

After the third years graduation and the disbanding of the group everyone started to go their separate ways and begin working toward their own personal dreams and goals.

There was Eli and Nozomi who got together almost immediately after they graduated, which didn't surprise anybody. Eli became a traditional dance instructor teaching both beginners and experts. Nozomi earned her teaching license and was now a teacher at Otonokizaka. They moved into a nearby house together which meant Honoka was able to regularly see the two of them and they became quite close over the years.

After high school Nico had started to follow her own dreams of becoming a professional idol. From what Honoka knew it was rough at the beginning. Nico had an advantage of being in a popular school idol group, but agencies were wary about her abilities as a solo act. She had to start with small local concerts and events, but over time she began to make a pretty big name for herself. Though she wasn't the world famous idol Nico that she dreamed that she would be. She was able to make her dream of making people smile a reality.

Though not everything had gone so smoothly for Nico throughout the years. She had begun to date Maki shortly before she graduated from high school and they were happy together. But after about a year their relationship began to be strained by the pressures of Nico being an idol. This lead to both not seeing each other very often and when they did it had to be in secret so they wouldn't attract unnecessary attention. The pressures of Nico having to keep her pure idol image eventually became to much and they both decided it was best to end their relationship, even if it did hurt the both of them.

After high school Maki wound up being pressured by her family into pursuing a career in medicine. Over time the pressure from her family, her schoolwork, and her failed relationship with Nico all took an emotional toll on her and she began to shirk away from her friends, and became somewhat distant with her old friends.

Rin was the first to notice Maki becoming more closed off during their final year of high school. So she decided to try and cheer her up and stay with her. She began studying hard and with tutoring from both Hanayo and Maki she was able to follow Maki into university to keep her from closing herself off completely. She ended up studying athletic training and currently works with a local baseball team as their trainer. Maki and her had grown close during their time together and began dating in their second year of university. They were both still happily together, even if Maki was reluctant to tell anyone just how happy Rin made her.

Hanayo ended up studying business and marketing during her university days and was now working with a local talent agency as a talent promoter and scout of sorts. She loved working so closely with up and coming idols and was glad she was able to follow her dream of getting into the idol world, even if she wasn't the one standing on stage. She was also one of the most persistent in making sure all of the members of Muse kept in regular contact by doing things like having group calls, arranging times to meet up, and making sure that nobody drifted to far apart. As far as Honoka knew, she never really dated anyone all throughout these years. There were a few people here and there but they never really amounted to anything. It almost seemed like she was waiting for someone specific to come along.

Kotori and Umi both went to the same university together after high school. Kotori studied design while Umi went on to study literature. After their graduation Kotori went on to internship, and eventually work under, one of Japan's biggest designers. Umi became a writer after her graduation offering her an outlet for her old lyric writing skills.

Even though the three childhood friends had split up, they all still made it a point to stay as close as they possibly could. Umi and Kotori would often come and visit Honoka on holidays or weekends off, while Honoka would do the same for them on occasions as well. Even after they graduated from university and Honoka had fully taken over her families shop they would still be sure to routinely call one another and message each other even if they couldn't meet face to face as often as they had once been able to. Honoka was oddly proud of being able to say that she was still best friends with her two childhood friends after all of this time.

Honoka's mind then went to the one thing that could bring down her perennially cheerful disposition, it was the fact that Umi and Kotori had been dating now for a little over two years. Honoka never liked that her friends dating had an impact on her mood but sometimes she just couldn't help it. Seeing someone you loved dating a cherished friend was hard sometimes, even if she had come to except it so long ago.

Over the past few years Honoka had dated a few people here and there, none of them really ever amounting to much more than a few happy memories. Her one relationship that lasted more than a few months was when she dated Tsubasa after she graduated from high school. The two former centers started spending more time together and when everyone was off at university or still in high school the two naturally began to grow a bit closer. Honoka was happy for the nearly one year that she dated Tsubasa, but eventually they ran into their own issues. Tsubasa unsurprisingly continued her idol work and that brought their relationship the same problems that Nico and Maki faced with their own. Eventually things just didn't work out and they parted ways without to much heartbreak and the two still kept in contact.

Though ultimately it was Tsubasa's idol work that drove the two apart, Honoka new that there was always one small thing that sat in the back of her mind anytime she would find someone new to date. It wasn't that she didn't love Tsubasa, because she did love her, but she knew that she always kept this slight spot in her heart open for one specific person to come in and finally fill it up completely.

Honoka's thoughts were broken as she heard the door to the shop open. She stood up straight and gave the new customer her signature wide smile.

“Welcome to Homura how may I help.....” Honoka didn't continue as she looked at the girl entering the shop.

Honoka wasn't sure the last time she had seen her, she was pretty sure it had been at least a few months. Honoka couldn't help herself as she ran out from behind the counter and embraced the girl in a bone crushing hug while picking her off the ground slightly, much to the girls dismay.

“It's been so long Umi-chan! Why didn't you tell me you were going to be in town.”

“Honoka put me down now!” Umi angrily yelled out as she was quickly set down. “Geez you never change do you.” No matter how much time she spent around Honoka, Umi was sure she would never get used to all her energy.

“Hehe I guess not. I just got really excited. I mean how long has it been since we've seen each other?”

“It's been three months.”

Honoka was a bit shocked at Umi's quick reply, but decided to just carry on.

“So how have you been Umi-chan? I know we talk over the phone but it's nice hearing it from you for a change.” Honoka questioned but couldn't help but let her excitement leak into her voice.

“I've been doing well. I got contracted to write another book not to long ago and have been pretty busy with that. It's actually why I haven't been able to visit in so long.” Umi's eyes softened as she continued, “ you know I really have missed spending time with you Honoka.”

Honoka felt her heart skip a beat at Umi's words, since when did Umi turn into such a charmer.

“I missed you a lot to Umi-chan. You know it's not the same around here without someone nagging me all the time about doing the right thing.”

“I thought I left that job for Eli when I wasn't around.”

“Oh she tried. But it just wasn't the same without Umi-chan's signature glare to scare me into doing work.”

“So that means you must have been making all kinds of trouble for everyone?” Umi couldn't help the small smirk that started to form.

“You really do know me to well Umi-chan.” Honoka finished with a large grin plastered across her face

Neither could hold themselves together much longer as both friends started laughing. Honoka always cherished the fact that no matter how long it had been since they last saw each other, she could always fall into the old routine with both Kotori and Umi.

“So how are things now that you've taken over the shop?” Umi asked with genuine curiosity.

“Things have been going just fine. We introduced some of our newest spring sweets that seem to be a hit, and as always our regular stuff is still as popular as ever.”

“So you still sell the original sweets from back when we were kids?”

“Yep, they actually are some of our best sellers. And you know I might have some freshly made ones ready here in a couple minutes.” Honoka ended with a slight mocking tone. She knew that if there was anything that Umi would get excited about, it was Homura's traditional sweets.

“Really could I have some!” Umi moved close to close to Honoka with a glimmer in her eye. She was quick to correct herself. “I mean, it's just been so long since I've had any. I have to make sure that you are carrying on the Homura tradition of making the best traditional Japanese sweets.”

“Of course you do Umi-chan.” Honoka couldn't help but giggle, which caused Umi's cheeks to flush.

“You know how much I like your sweets Honoka. Why do you have to tease me like that?”

“It's just in good fun Umi-chan, and of course you can take some home with you.”

With that the two old friends fell back into swapping stories about things that had happened while they were away. From Honoka's attempts at making special sweets that would almost always backfire. To Umi's writers block that she would have to deal with every couple of months.

As they continued to swap stories back and forth one thing that slipped Honoka's mind earlier began to resurface.

“Hey if your in town that must mean Kotori-chan is here to. Where is she?”

This truly did seem odd to Honoka. The couple almost never went anywhere without one another and it was so odd to see one of them without the other.

“I'm not entirely sure. I think she came back pretty recently. Did she not tell you?”

“No I even talked to her this past Saturday and she didn't say anything about meeting up or coming back.”

Umi looked like she was noticeably uncomfortable with the questioning about Kotori, but Honoka decided she would press on anyway.

“How are you two doing anyway? I haven't heard to much from Kotori-chan lately.”

“You mean she hasn't told you?”

“No she hasn't told me anything. Why did something happen.”

Honoka didn't blame Kotori for not telling her if something were wrong in her relationship with Umi. Anytime Honoka and Kotori would talk they would both steer clear of discussing the couples relationship any more then they needed to. It was something Honoka was grateful for, because she was pretty sure that Kotori had known about her own feelings for Umi before the two of them had started dating. Sometimes she would notice that Kotori would noticeably feel bad when talking about her relationship. Honoka made sure to never blame Kotori for loving Umi, if it was what both of them wanted she would never try and stop them from becoming happy, and over time she learned to deal with it.

“Well me and Kotori aren't together anymore.” Umi confessed while looking down at the ground.

This was not something that Honoka had expected to happen, and she was shocked to say the least. Their relationship seemed so steady that she never thought that something like this would ever happen.

“I'm so sorry Umi-chan I didn't know. Are you alright?” Honoka moved a bit closer in order to put a reassuring arm around her friend, but was stopped when Umi looked up at her.

“It happened a while ago I've learned to deal with it.”

Honoka couldn't see any signs of Umi lying but something about what she said bothered her.

“What do you mean it happened a while ago? When did you two break up?” Honoka asked both questions in quick succession she was trying to take all this in as quickly as possible.

“Well it was three months ago. Right after we left from our last visit with you.” Umi stated with what seemed like indifference.

“Wait what! How come I'm just finding out about this now. I could have been there for the both of you if you needed it.” Honoka was slightly hurt that she had found out something so important about her friends so late.

Umi noticed that Honoka seemed to be taking this pretty badly and offered her a small smile.

“I thought that Kotori would have already told you so that's why I never said anything.” Umi's smile dropped into a more serious face as she continued. “But I also had a lot of things on my mind after we broke up so I needed some time to think some thing through.”

Honoka's anger dissipated slightly at Umi's words but still needed some more answers.

“So is that why we haven't seen each other in so long?”

“Yeah, I was pretty heartbroken over the break up when it first happened, but there was something that I started to think about after it was over.”

Honoka saw something that seemed like determination flash across Umi's face as she finished her sentence.

“Do you mind if I ask why you guys broke up.” Honoka asked sheepishly hoping that it wasn't to touchy a subject, she really wanted to know what could have possibly drove the two apart.

“Well it wasn't really one thing that happened. Eventually we both just realized that, although we did love each other a great deal, we both realized we both might be happier with other people.”

“That seems like a really odd reason to break off a relationship that had been going on for two years.” Honoka still couldn't fully come to terms with what Umi was telling her. She always thought that the two were madly in love.

Umi chuckled, “maybe it is. But it was something that we both agreed on so there isn't to many hard feeling between us.”

“When you say you both would be happier with other people, what do you mean?”

Honoka decided to focus on that one point. It gave her a little glimmer of hope that maybe after all these years, that small sectioned off part of her heart could be filled by the one it was reserved for.

“I really loved Kotori, but I always felt that someone could give her better than I could. That there was someone who could do things that I couldn't do for her. It felt like me and Kotori wanted different things out of our relationship and I couldn't be the one to provide the things she wanted.”

“Are you serious. That sounds like the weirdest breakup ever.” Honoka deadpanned

Umi didn't respond and simply laughed. She agreed with Honoka it was a bit of an unorthodox breakup.

“So does that mean Kotori-chan found someone new?” Honoka asked curiously. If she didn't even know about Kotori and Umi breaking up who knows what else she didn't know about.

“Well I don't know if I should be the one to tell you this, but she has been making trips to go see Hanayo at her work everyday.”

“Really! I remember those two getting pretty close after Muse disbanded but I never would have thought that they would ever get together.”

“Well you know how Hanayo has been ever since everyone moved on with their lives. She was always keeping everyone close and I could tell that it was something that meant quite a bit to Kotori.”

“Wow I never would have guessed. But you know they do seem really cute together.” Honoka immediately regretted what she said. “I'm sorry Umi-chan.”

“It's fine Honoka. I've had a lot of time to sort out my feelings and I've come to terms with it. I know that Kotori has as well.”

Honoka let out a sigh of relief, she was glad that she didn't say something to carelessly hurt Umi.

“But you know Honoka during those months while I was sorting out my own feelings I discovered something.”

“And what would that be Umi-chan.”

“That there is someone out there that I think could make me really happy.”

Honoka didn't answer and simply stared at Umi trying to keep her own emotions in check. Maybe this was finally the time that she could be with the person that she had wanted for so long. It made her sad that this opportunity had to come from a break up between her two best friends. But it had been three months and it seemed like Kotori had gotten over it, Umi was even the one who brought it up in the first place.

Umi steadied herself and took a deep breath preparing for something she had planned out for some time now.

“Honoka I need you to listen to what I'm going to say, and don't interrupt me please. I want you to hear everything I'm going to tell you.” Umi told Honoka while giving her a determined look.

Honoka knew that look well. It was the same one Umi had before she would perform a concert, or when she was competing in archery. Honoka knew that whatever Umi was going to tell her that it was important, and Honoka couldn't help but get excited.

“Honoka, me and you have been friends for a really long time now and I appreciate that fact every day. You were the first person to reach out to me and try and bring me into a world that, at the time, I didn't even know existed. You made me experience things that my younger self would have never been able to do alone.”

Honoka felt a faint blush come over her face as she continued to look at Umi's deep brown eyes that were filled with determination. She kept quite as Umi continued on.

“Every time I see you I can't help but think of all of these wonderful things that you were responsible for, and all of the wonderful adventures that you would take me on next.” Umi's face lost it's determination and took on a more somber look. “But after Muse disbanded and we began our third year I started to change how I felt about you.”

Honoka could barely contain her own emotions at this point and wanted to just jump out and hug Umi. But she wouldn't do that if Umi was going through all this to tell her this, she would wait until Umi was finished.

“When we started our third year I started to see you as less of that shinning childhood friend, and instead I started to see you as more of a nuisance.”

Honoka's heart tensed up at that. This isn't what she thought this was. Honoka had always known that sometimes she could get on Umi's nerves and could cause her some stress, but she always thought it was all in good fun. If Umi really had started to see her as a nuisance, Honoka worried that she may simply be tossed aside. That maybe Umi had decided that the burden of being around Honoka had finally began to weigh down on her to much. Honoka still stayed silent, not that she really wanted to say anything now.

“I started to think that maybe my life wouldn't be as hard or as stressful if I didn't have to spend as much time around you. Initially I hated having these thought, I really have always held your friendship so dearly. The thought of my life being better if I didn't have to watch over you was one that I normally would have never entertained. Yet in our third year you kept up with your same antics and I guess at some point the idea of not having to be around you all the time became an appealing one.”

Honoka could almost feel her own heart being torn from her chest. This wasn't something she needed to hear right now. After getting her hopes up so high that maybe they had the opportunity to be together and than to have Umi tear them away was simply to much. Even with all this, Honoka did her best to keep composed, even if she could feel the tears starting to form at the corner of her eye.

Umi noticed that Honoka was getting upset over what she was saying. But she knew that she had to tell her all of this if she was going to get her final message across. She simply hoped that Honoka would be able to bear with it for just a little longer.

“I still wanted to be your friend but after we graduated I was secretly glad to finally have some distance between us so someone else would have to deal with you.”

Umi looked at Honoka to see that the girl had tears beginning to form in her eyes. Umi decided to hurry things up so she wouldn't hurt her anymore.

“But when I got my wish of being separated from you I started to realize something. My life without you around began to seem just a bit more dull than usual.” Umi's somber face was replaced with a warm smile. “Things that I would normally be able to do or enjoy with you around just didn't seem as bright. Whether it was just eating lunch or spending time with friends, when you weren't around I always felt like there was a small piece of my happiness missing.”

Honoka felt her heart unclench and her tears fade away, and little inkling of hope took hold of her.

“This feeling of being incomplete continued for a long time until me and Kotori began dating. My new feelings for her were able to fill that emptiness and make me genuinely happy again. We spent a lot of time together and I was in love with her, she was able to make me feel like I did when I was younger, when I was with you Honoka.”

Umi knew that the moment that she had been preparing herself for this past month was quickly arriving. She hoped that she would be able to get what she wanted say across, and that Honoka would be willing to accept.

“Little did I know that Kotori could only fill that gap temporarily. Soon enough that same dullness came back and it just wouldn't leave. I became so attached to Kotori since she was the only one who could bring back the color to my life even if it would only be temporary. Kotori began to notice that I became a bit less outgoing, if that were even possible. She would talk to me about it constantly and ask me questions about the way I was feeling. She was the one who first approached me about the possibility of breaking up. I was so against it at first, I would never want to hurt her and I wanted to keep her close to me.”

Honoka felt like she was getting to see a side of Umi that almost nobody had ever seen. She was making herself so defenseless and vulnerable.

“But Kotori was persistent about this. Always telling me that I should really try and find my own happiness. I never really understood what she meant but she was so persistent about it. Finally she told me that she was starting to feel the same things that I was feeling, and she started to bring up the fact that maybe our relationship was meant to end so we could both find someone who could bring us our own happiness. That was when she broke it off and said that it was for the best, I didn't want to believe her at first and was heartbroken. But in those months after the breakup I began to understand what she meant. That I should find the person who was able to make me truly happy.”

Honoka felt her hope coming back quickly as Umi continued on.

“During those three months I thought about when I was truly happy and who was able to make me happy. I thought back to all the different friends I'd made over the years and none of them really stood out. The only person who I could remember that could always make me happy and make my days brighter was you Honoka.” Umi ended with a large smile and some small tears threatening to fall from the edge of her eyes, but she wasn't sad. No, Umi was more happy than she had been in some time.

Honoka wasn't sure how to react, to her that sounded like a confession, but she couldn't be sure. She had to ask and confirm what she was hearing.

“D-Does that meant what I think it does Umi-chan.” Honoka's voice was trembling not in fear but in excitement.

“Honoka I know that you're going to cause me more problems in the future, and that sometimes you will annoy me and I will get mad at you. But I can't replace the feeling that I have when I'm around you. You bring the color back into my world Honoka, you make me happy by just simply being around you, and I hate that it took me so long to realize it. What I'm saying Honoka, is that I love you.”

Honoka couldn't hold back any longer and launched herself at Umi enveloping her in the deepest hug she could muster. Umi didn't fight back and quickly returned the embrace, she was so relived to know that Honoka felt the same way.

“I love you! I love you! I love you!” Honoka was shouting as she buried her head into Umi's shoulder. She just had to say it out loud to finally let Umi know how she felt.

Umi didn't respond and simply kept holding Honoka close while running a hand through her hair. It felt so good to hold her this close and to have her all to herself.

They stayed this way embracing one another, simply letting the emotions of the moment wash over them. Honoka was the first to pull away but didn't fully and moved her hands up to Umi's shoulders.

“Honoka what are you..”

Umi was cut off as Honoka leaned in and kissed her. It was a quick chaste kiss and Honoka pulled away quickly to look at Umi. The girl was nearly glowing red and was obviously seriously embarrassed.

“H-Honoka what are you doing!”

“What, when two people love each other they kiss, don't they? I bet you liked it didn't you?” Honoka questioned with a bashful smile, she knew that would get a good reaction from Umi.

“That's not the problem here!” Umi took a deep breath to compose herself before continuing. “You need to let me know when you are going to do things like that.”

“Aww but why?”

“Because I need to prepare myself for these kinds of things.”

“Okay fine.” Honoka flashed a large smile at Umi. “May I kiss you Umi-chan?”

“Y-Yes you may.”

Honoka wrapped her arms around Umi's neck while Umi put hers on Honoka's waist both pulling each other closer until their lips finally met. The new lovers both lost themselves in the kiss as they pulled closer trying their hardest to deepen the kiss and to make the moment last for as long as they possibly could.

Honoka was the first to break the kiss slightly gasping for air as she leaned against Umi burying her face in the crook of her neck, while also beginning to run her hands through Umi's hair.

“You know Umi-chan. I'm going to cause you a lot of trouble know that we are dating.”

“Yup.”

“And sometimes I'm going to be a little annoying.”

“Mhmm.”

“And you are going to have to make sure I don't do anything stupid.”

“Honoka, I wouldn't have it any other way.”

Honoka didn't respond as she picked her head up and gave Umi a quick kiss on the check. After all this time both Umi and Honoka had finally found someone who made them truly happy.

 


End file.
